#growth

The Art of Waiting

~ Ella Hicks

“I have done nothing all summer but to wait for myself to be myself again.” — Georgia O’Keeffe


As this season draws to a close,
I find myself reflecting on the power of waiting.
I think about how healing often unfolds in silence.
It happens in slowness and unseen places.
What follows is not an explanation or a roadmap,
but a prayer I needed to write for myself.

I. The Courage to Wait

There is a wisdom in waiting that our culture does not honor.
We live in a world obsessed with productivity, speed, and achievement.
Rest is mistaken for laziness, and silence is confused with absence.

All summer, I waited.
For the quiet to soften me.
For the storms inside to pass.
For the woman I lost along the way to rise and meet me again.

And she is coming—
slowly, fiercely, wholly—
like a wildflower breaking through stone,
like the horizon pulling light back into itself.

This is what healing often asks of us:
to trust the invisible underground work,
and the gestation that can’t be hurried.
Seeds must split in the dark before they bloom in the light.
Similarly, we must surrender to seasons of waiting.
Only then can we rise whole again.

II. The Feminine Rhythm

In the feminine soul, healing does not move in straight lines.
It circles and spirals.
It withdraws before it returns.
It rests before it creates.

This rhythm is not weakness—it is ancient wisdom.
The body knows how to heal.
The spirit knows how to return.
Our task is not to force it, but to allow it.
To trust that our becoming is not delayed;
it is ripening.

III. The Dawn Always Comes

We don’t always heal by doing more.
Sometimes we heal by waiting.
By letting silence do its work.
By trusting that the parts of us we thought were gone
are only gathering strength to return.

If you’ve been waiting for yourself, know this:
she is still here.
She is still coming back.

And when she rises,
it will be with roots deeper,
branches stronger,
and a light no storm can take away.

So breathe.
Wait.
Trust.

For the dawn always comes.

Ella xx

The Lost Flowers of Alice Hart: A Profound Reflection

~ Ella Hicks ~ 1 Comment

In the realm of Amazon Prime’s extensive library, there’s a hidden gem that recently caught my attention: “The Lost Flowers of Alice Hart.” Highly recommended by my friend Heather, I embarked on this journey, not fully prepared for the emotions it would stir within me. As I sat through its episodes, I found myself very triggered, and I felt a strong urge to share my thoughts and experiences with all of you.

When my friend initially asked if I had seen this series, I responded with a “no,” but with a promise to check it out. Her emphatic endorsement made it clear that this was a must-watch. I opened up Amazon Prime, and to my surprise, I discovered that the show had been partially viewed, halfway through the first episode. I thought that perhaps my son’s girlfriend had started it, so I decided to begin from the very beginning.

As the story unfolded, I couldn’t help but notice some eerie familiarity, which I initially attributed to a trailer or an advertisement I might have glimpsed earlier. I persisted with my viewing. When I reached the halfway point, a profound realization struck me – I had watched this episode before. I had watched until the midway mark and then abruptly turned it off. The reason was simple: it had triggered me to such an extent that I had buried the memory deep within my psyche. This is the insidious nature of trauma; it can hide within us, resurfacing unexpectedly.

This time, I pushed through the initial discomfort and watched the entire first episode. Last night, I completed all seven episodes. It was emotionally challenging at times, but I persevered because I understood why my friend had recommended it so strongly. It was a necessary watch. “The Lost Flowers of Alice Hart” mirrors my life and the mission of Rebel Thriver in countless ways. To avoid spoilers, I won’t delve into the storyline any further.

Connection is vital for survivors on a path of healing. Sharing the stories of survivors and listening to their voices is essential. Healing cannot thrive in isolation; we require spaces where we can come together and simply be. I am grateful to Amazon Prime for featuring this profoundly realistic production. It tells a version of our stories that educates people and validates the experiences of survivors worldwide, even though it originates from Australia.

I wholeheartedly encourage all the women you know to watch this Prime show. Sigourney Weaver’s portrayal in the lead role is nothing short of incredible, and she is supported by a cast of complex and dynamic female characters. Ultimately, at its core, the series conveys a message of healing and resilience, leaving a powerful impact.

I know it may be hard to watch, but I encourage you to try. Share this with your friends and consider having a watch party with it. Like trauma, this story has layers that need to be unpacked. There are patterns of generational abuse and dysfunction, and this is a place where we can see the big picture laid out. It’s like an archeological dig…little by little you begin to unearth the truth.

Ella xx

“And her light stretches over salt sea equally and flowerdeep fields.”
-Sappho

Love Your Beautiful Self

~ rebelthriver2 ~ Leave a comment

Do not wear your body as an apology.
Wear it proudly. Be in awe of your form,
for what it is or where it gets you,
for what it allows you to feel and do.

– Bianca Sparacin

Wear it proudly, my loves! You know that saying “Youth is wasted on the young”? I think of all the ways I “wore my body as an apology” when I was younger. Looking back I see how beautiful I was, in my own unique way, but saw nothing but flaws. I wish I could reach back through time, grab my younger self by the shoulders, and make her see sense. While that’s not possible, what I can do is make sure I speak to my inner child and live my message now. I see my body as my sacred vessel, and I am grateful for all the ways it fights for me, carries me, and allows me to feel and interact with the world. My freckles, stretch marks, wrinkles, and whatever else society says needs fixing, I now know is just another paint stroke to the masterpiece painting that is me. Love your beautiful self, and that includes your body; every inch! I hope you recognize how remarkable all that makes You up is, and that you see it now, not in hindsight. Free yourselves from the illusion that there is anything wrong with your body other than the story you’ve been telling yourself, about how there’s something wrong with your body. 

-Leila Dashtara